I spent the afternoon telling Zoe, Sarah and Will about Nick and the events of the night before. I ran through a few times, just to get their opinions and to, eventually, reassure me that it wasn't my fault.
Zoe said that he was afraid of commitment, Sarah said he was gay and Will said he wasn't worth my time, especially if he is just going to up and leave whenever anything gets slightly more serious.
All good advice, but none of it was what I wanted to hear. I wanted them to tell me that it was okay and that it was still worth chasing him. I wanted them to tell me that I should arrange another date and try and be less full on (even though I was about as full on as a broken down train last night!) but they didn't say anything of the sort. They just fulfilled the perfect friend role - once you get hurt by someone else, they will chew them up and spit them out to try and make you feel better. Sure, making me feel like I am too good for him is a nice way to put it, but I can't stop thinking about the tosser...seriously. It's like I've taken a Nick pill and I am just constantly trippin'.
"Ya know what Annie, you should try a more intellectual type of man." said Zoe. "Someone who is deep and literate and enjoys cultural things like museums and art galleries. I'm telling you, those are the type of men who treat you well. Not that I am speaking from experience or anything, because half the time Henry makes me feel about as cultured as a toothbrush, but nevertheless, I still think that is the way to go."
Poor Zoe. Henry really treats her badly. I mean, for an oldie, he could do an awful lot worse. He must be considered a hero by his mates that he has a woman who is so much ounger than him, but still, he takes advantage. Bastard.
"Zoe, that sounds wonderful, but lets think about this for one minute. Me? Culture? When was the last time I did anything remotely cultured? My idea of culture is switching onto BBC 1 on a Sunday afternoon to find "Songs of Praise" in full swing, only to mock it for about a minute before flicking over to Eastenders or something." I exclaimed.
"That's where you're wrong, Annie. You are an ex-art student. You studied culture for god sake. There must be something inside you that could latch on to some book worm..." insisted Zoe.
"Latch on? Oh, thanks very much Zo, make me sound like a leech why don't you? And, besides, I didn't study culture. I studied too much alcohol intake and ridiculously late nights and living in squalor. Fine art was right at the bottom of the priority list in those days, so, in turn, I know as much about art as Hitler does about being nice to people."
"I think what Zoe's trying to say here, Annie, is that you should raise your standards a little. Don't just go for the first guy that is willing to look at you for a few seconds of his day. I mean, really, the way you met Nick was slightly unconventional, and lets face it, a tad creepy." added Sarah.
"Well, maybe creepy and unconventional is okay. Maybe that's how I want to fall in love. Leaving things like this up to fate is always a good idea." I defended my corner rigorously, quoting the knowledge I got from my "What Men Want" books.
"Just try nicer guys. Don't just go for the hunk of the pack, ya know?" she added.
I had noticed that Will hadn't said anything. I looked over at him, sitting on the grass, looking slightly vacant. He still had bruising around his cheeks where he had been punched, and he had some cuts on his arms that would soon become scars, forever reminding him about the ordeal, but in general, he was getting better.
"Will, are you okay? You've been awfully quiet." I enquired.
"Have I? Oh, sorry. I was just listening to the conversation."
"Well, what do you think?" I asked.
"I think he is a closet homosexual to turn you down, Annie."
Has crude as his phrasing was, I found his comment rather sweet and touching. I looked at Will. As he spoke, he looked up at me and a slight softness took over his bruised face, and his familiar smile began to emerge again. I had been a long time since I had seen that.
"Aww, Will. Thank you. But, I very much doubt he is gay."
"Well, that's just what I think." He mumbled. I was getting some strange vibes from him today, but before I could ask him what was wrong, Sarah piped up again with a rather interesting idea.
"Look over there Annie. You see that man sitting under the tree? Reading a book? He looks very intellectual and cultured, not to mention, rather good looking. Why don't you go and talk to him?"
"Yeah, right." I replied.
"Oh, what's the worse that could happen?"
"I could introduce myself to him."
"Well, I think you should at least try. Go on. Forget weirdo Nick who walked out on you. Go talk to bookworm man under the tree!" Sarah always had a way with words.
Before I knew it, Zoe was encouraging me to go. Will was staying quiet. Zoe and Sarah got so annoying, eventually, I just decided to go for it. I started thinking to myself that it could be quite fun going to talk to a complete stranger. I mean, it was always on my list of things to do before I turn 30, and that isn't all that far away now, so I may as well begin ticking things off.
I got up off the grass and brushed the blades off my trousers. I casually began to stroll over to the tree where this stranger was sitting. I looked over my shoulder at my friends who were whispering and giggling whilst looking at me. When Sarah caught my eye, she made a WHOOPING kind of a sound that made my freeze on my spot and shoot evils in her general direction, in an attempt to make her shut up. Friends, honestly. They will look after your own interests, until they can embarrass you at the first opportunity.
I closed in on the stranger under the tree. I started noticing details. He had short, cropped hair and quite rounded features. He wasn't what I would call drop dead gorgeous, but he was attractive, no doubt about it. He was quite rounded all over in fact. He wasn't fat. He wasn't even chubby. But, he had the kind of figure that you could see getting fat in later years. He was wearing blue jeans and a brown corduroy jacket. The white shirt underneath finished off the look and one singular pendant hung round his neck a fell down to his chest level. That was a nice touch.
He seemed very engrossed in his book. What was I supposed to do? I was only a few metres away from him now, and I knew that if I went any closer he would look up at me. How do you disturb a man who is reading a book under a tree? I started thinking of ways to break the ice...all were pathetic, but I could only stand in the middle of the park on my own for so long before people began thinking I was a physco, so I just bit the bullet and took my chance on the first thing that came to my head.
I marched up to him, walking right past him in fact. Almost passing him completely. He didn't even look up. As I walked past him, I 'accidentally' noticed what he was reading. Something called "The Age of Man". I stopped, turned around and opened my mouth.
"The Age of Man? Oh, I love that book. It really makes a great read, you know." I blurted out. He look up at me. Stared at me for a few seconds. It felt like years. I was just stood there, smiling like a geek, waiting for this stranger, who I had disturbed, to say something in reply. Eventually, he did.
"Oh, you like it do you?" he said with a sly smirk. "That is strange. I have never met a woman who enjoys this book. I have always wanted to though."
"Well, you're in luck then! I am your woman!" I joked, nervously. What in gods name was I doing? "The Age of Man is where it is...at." IDIOT! DON'T USE SLANG TO COMPLIMENT A BOOK YOU HAVE NO IDEA ABOUT!!!!
It is indeed where it is...at. Tell me, what did you think about chapter 7? I have always wanted to discuss it with someone, but there's never been anyone around. Would you mind?" he said as he gestured to me sitting on the grass in front of him.
"Really?" I said nervously. "Okay." I sat down on the grass and started trying to think up something clever about chapter 7 in a book I had never heard of, let alone read. "I would say that Chapter 7 was interesting. Slightly...slow, though. I mean, the story line is a bit...unimaginative. Plus, it could never really, erm, happen. I mean, the man in the story is obviously at an age where, erm, he, is, ya know? slightly, erm, older than he was, ya know...before? and I think chapter 7 is good, erm, for...that." What a 100% carrot moron I actually was. That didn't even make sense.
The man in front of me put his book down, raised is hands and started to clap. Then he started to laugh. Then, he was clapping AND laughing.
"That is the best load of bullshit I have ever heard about a book! And I should know, I critique them. My whole profession is based on bullshit, but you...you have just surpassed all known levels! What an ice breaker. Bravo!" he carried on laughing and clapping. I felt my cheeks getting hotter and hotter. Damn it, I had completely blown my chances of a good first impression. As usual.
"Well, you sussed me out. I'm sorry to have wasted your time." I said morbidly. I started to get up, when he stopped me.
"Where are you going? C'mon, don't tell me that's it. You spend at least 5 minutes of your day coming up with something as colourful as that, just so you can have an excuse to talk to me, and then decide to leave when you think it hasn't been successful? Well that's not very good is it?" he said, all the while with a massive smile on his face. He had blue eyes that lit up when he smiled. I quite liked that.
"Well, I've just made a complete fool out of myself, so I won't bother interrupting you anymore." His smile faded.
"Don't be silly. You walked over here, by yourself, and hit with rather a terrible, albeit imaginative, line. I think that at least deserves a coffee. Dont you?"
Was this stranger offering to take me out for a coffee? Had I actually cracked it? Could I finally talk to strangers without being an idiot?
"Well, erm, that would be, ya know..." SPIT YOUR WORDS OUT WOMAN...
"Great? Fabulous? Lovely?" he said, trying to finish my sentence off for me. I sighed.
"That would be lovely."
"Excellent! Well, there's a lovely new place round the corner that only opened last week. It is supposed to serve a mean coffee and cake. Shall we stroll over there and test it out?" he proposed.
"Yes, that sounds great."
"Very glad to see that you are enthused about my suggestion." He stood up and offered his hand to me." I'm Robin, by the way." he introduced.
"Hi Robin, I'm Annie." I said, shaking his hand.
I nipped back over to Zoe and Sarah. I had noticed that Will had gone. When I asked them where, they told me he wasn't feeling too well and just wanted to be by himself. Odd that Will would act like that, but they told me not to worry. I quickly told them what happened as I grabbed my bag and jacket. They were happy for me, giving me the usual friendly lines of "Go get him girl" and "One more name for the old black book then." but despite their comments and friendly jabs, I was happy. Happy that Sarah had suggested it, happy that I had gone through with it and happy that this guy, who seemed really lovely and had a wicked sense of humour, was about to buy me coffee and cake from the new place round the corner! He knew the way to a woman's heart, that's for sure.
I said goodbye to Zoe and Sarah and nipped back over to where Robin was waiting. As we turned around and started walking towards the park exit, I looked over my shoulder to see my friends smiling and winking at me.
I had a good feeling about this. I don't know why. I just did.
